don’t you hate it when you’re reading a chapter and then it’s coming to its climax and omg what’s gonna happen, then woops, your eyes dart to the last line and you spoil yourself and hate yourself for it
this is why, in particularly intense reading situations, i physically put my hand over the bottom of the page so i can’t accidentally spoil myself.
i take this shit seriously.
Holy shit that thing really works
THIS is how you advertise a bra!!
the noise I just made
A shit ton of guys are really confused right now
That was the hottest thing I’ve even seen. And also makes me want to buy that bra.
That is excellent marketing.
hey what if someone invented a machine that allowed women to transfer their pregnancies to men and then the government passed a law that if a woman didn’t want to have a baby the biological father was required to carry it how fast do you think birth control would stop being an issue
BEST NIGHTBLOG POST EVER
"IT’S UNETHICAL TO FORCE PEOPLE TO CARRY A BABY!!!!" MEN SHOUT
"NO FUCKING SHIT!!!!" WOMEN REPLY
I strongly disagree with anyone who says Maleficent isn’t the best Disney villain. No singing, no dancing, no long expositions about her plans, no tolerance for bumbling comedy sidekicks (she electrocutes a whole room full of minions when she finds out they’ve fucked up and spent the last few years searching for a baby), just outright malicious intent.
I mean let’s take a look at her motivations compared to other popular Disney villains:
SCAR - Wanted to become King.
URSULA - Wanted to rule the seas.
WICKED QUEEN - Wanted to rule as the most beautiful woman in the land.
JAFAR - Wanted to rule in the Sultan’s place and/or obtain ultimate power.
Maleficient, by contrast, didn’t want any of that. She didn’t want more power. She didn’t want fame. She didn’t want to rule. She just wanted to raise hell. This is the woman who decided that every newborn child in the kingdom should die and that the land should be covered in darkness for one reason - SHE WASN’T INVITED TO A MOTHERFUCKING PARTY.
That’s right, the evil bitch basically condemned an entire kingdom to die at her hands because she didn’t get invited to a christening.
This is not a woman with a motivation. She cannot be reasoned with. Her actions cannot be rationalized. She is evil for the fun of being evil, not because she wants something.
THAT, my friends, is the ultimate villain. One who knows they’re evil and LOVES it.